One of the last things we did at the Crime and Punishment museum was get fingerprinted. This activity proved what I had known for sometime already – I could definitely get away with commiting a crime as my fingerprints are pretty unreadable.

This theory started when I was about 18 and worked as an adult presence / camp counselor at my high school’s summer camp (which was run for incoming freshmen). As I would be working with “children” (meaning people about 4 years younger than me) I needed to get fingerprinted and have a background check run on me. So I did my time at the summer camps and then was packing to go back to Boston for college when I got a letter in the mail telling me to “cease and desist” because the state hadn’t been able to read my fingerprints. (Real safe system by the way, I was told to stop working with “kids” 3 months after the fact.)

So maybe it was just a fluke right? I don’t think so. Because then they started fingerprinting for the exam I was taking to get my credentials. You have to check in and check out by having your index finger scanned. This meant that I had to start showing up for the exam 30 minutes earlier than normal in order to go through the motions of trying to check in with my fingerprint before the prometrics center worker would decide to override the system with some special code he had because my fingerprint would just not work.

So all this adds up to me clearly having picked the wrong profession as I’d make the perfect thief.

Meanwhile I don’t know if I was the greatest adult presence as I spent most of my nights playing “I never” with the Junior and Senior camp counselors. I knew I was in trouble when the first couple of statements from the high school counselors were “I’ve never been on a date” and “I’ve never held hands with a boy.” Usually it was a tie for last place with one of my best friends / another “adult presence.”