My dad half thought I was kidding when I invited him to Emma’s preschool graduation… but the whole thing was certainly no joke…. it was a months in the making program by the students and teachers and at least a couple days in the making by the parents who had to, in true aloha spirit, make sure that their kid had enough leis to give out to their 15 classmates and all the teachers in attendance.
And after months of practicing (they sang 4 songs and had a dress change into their robes), a slide show presentation (which unfortunately went down half way through as Vimeo crashed nationwide… real nice Vimeo!), parent speakers, etc. it was all over and I was left holding a bag full of leis and attempting not to cry at leaving the school that had been a home away from home for Emma for the last three years. Emma’s been at her daycare/preschool since May 2016 right before she turned 2. During that time she made great friends (whose parents became my friends) and learned so much academically as well as about herself (as this is really where she started developing her hilarious, overly self-confident, smart-alecky self). Boy, if I’m a sap now for a 4-year-old graduation, I’ll be completely crazy in 13 years when she graduates high school.
So for all you 2019 Graduates (and parents!) whether it is college, high school or even preschool… just remember:
You’re off to great places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So… Get on your way!
And with that, Emma’s first hula performance is in the books… and yes, she is the only child that waved… 🤦♀️🤣🤷♀️ (at Royal Hawaiian Center)
It was a rough morning for Emma as she had to decide which princess she wanted to be for Prince and Princess day at school today before finally settling on the one that came with a musical instrument. 😳😬 #sorryteachers!
I’ve wondered from time to time what to do with this space, because I love being able to look back on my time on the East Coast, young, no kids, living up the newly(ish) married life with Ryan without worries like Children and a crippling Hawai’i house mortgage. But I never seem to get back in the swing of things. I guess we’ll give it another go and see how long I stick to it this time around.
So what’s up with me?
1) I’m pregnant. I guess it only took us 8 months to make that happen, which isn’t long in the big scheme of things but man was it heartbreaking (I had three miscarriages before this little nugget stuck around). Baby boy is coming at the end of May and I’m both beyond thrilled and terrified about juggling one more obstacle/schedule/person.
2) It’s kindergarten admissions times. This is the worst thing ever. Public schools are really bad here, causing a vicious cycle of everyone scrimping and saving whatever money they can afford to send their kids to a private school. But before you can do that, your 4 year old has to impress a series of educators and admissions heads by being the smartest, cutest, most articulate kid ever. And it’s not just the kid, Ryan and I have had to write essay questions and go to our own interviews as well. It’s the worst. The application process starts in October and you don’t get acceptance or rejection letters until April. Have I mentioned it’s the worst?
3) I got selected to be a part of this leadership program at work. It’s super impressive and people would kill to be in my shoes. The reason I bring this up is not to brag on here but because before you can “graduate” at the end of the program you have to work on, turn in and present a huge capstone project over the summer. And you know how I’m giving birth in May… guess when my maternity leave is? Yup, over the summer. Work was super accommodating and gave me three options: 1) I could drop out with no hard feelings – ummm no! As I said people would kill to be in my shoes. 2) I could drop out of this year’s program and automatically get a spot saved on next year’s program – not horrible but the program started in August so I already have put in 6 months of the program and juggling my regular job on top of it. It has been exhausting and I really don’t want to do it again. Or 3) continue as planned… aka maternity leave will also be capstone project time. That’s the one I decided to go with. Scary (especially since Emma will be home a lot during this time too) but I guess working on the project will help my mind not turn to mush at the end of this. And how did I find myself in this predicament? Like why didn’t I just wait a few more months before trying to get knocked up? Well, after 8 months of tears and either negative pregnancy tests or miscarriages, we were ready to get fertility help. My appointment was already scheduled when I found myself sitting in my boss’s office as he told me the amazing news about getting selected for the program. I sat there barely listening because in my mind I was changing priorities… telling myself that this would be good, I could take a break from all the stress of getting pregnant and just focus on my career for a little bit. Geesh, that line people tell you, how you get pregnant when you stop trying… it’s infuriating but it’s true…. found out I was pregnant the day of my first program meeting.
4) Emma’s teacher told us that Emma is one of the best negotiators she’s ever met… heads above her peers. When we asked what she meant by this it turns out Emma was negotiating with the teacher what type of school work to do that day. Great, can’t wait for her teenage years. So there’s that.
5) I’m really obsessed with eating at hot pot restaurants right now. Yum!
That kid, man… most of the time drives me crazy but then does something out of the blue like this morning when she asked me to send a letter to the North Pole. I rolled my eyes thinking it was an advance on next years’ Christmas list but it turns out she had written some additional thank you letters that we hadn’t asked her to do. She’s apparently now working on thank you letters to my co-workers (which sorry friends… I wasn’t even going to do 😳🤣). #lovethiskid
On how I’m a horrible, lazy and inattentive parent.
Emma is afraid of EVERYTHING. I’d like to say I don’t know where she gets it from but I think I was way worse when I was her age. Taking off Friday in order to get a four-day weekend (since Monday is Labor Day), Emma and I found ourselves at Haleiwa Beach in order to get in some sun before “checking-in” to our north shore Airbnb. Our beach time started out the same as other days at the beach, with Emma obsessed with getting ocean water into her buckets but too fearful to do it by herself causing me to make endless trips between the shoreline and our blankets and sun tent. After awhile of playing water getter I was parched and told Emma we had to return to our sun tent for a water break. Shortly after that however Emma decided she could fill up the buckets all by herself. I weighed the dangers in my mind of letting her go off without me versus letting her try this to build her confidence and bravery and came up with the following: 1) there was no undertow, 2) even though there were waves at the most they would only come up to her knees where she was standing and lastly, 3) I could reach her to help her in about 1 second if she did get in trouble.
So I feigned disinterest in her new plans and secretly watched her like a hawk as she happily headed off to the water, bucket in tow. Everything was fine at first but then a big wave came and knocked her over. My brain had to work in overdrive telling my body not to jump up and race to her side but instead wait and she what she would do. Would she start to get upset or would she stand back up completely fine, knowing that the water was barely covering her butt.
I didn’t get to find out. A father playing with his own kid nearby raced over and picked her up. Truth be told I was super irritated that he ruined my “test” but chagrined enough to call out a thank you as he passed by a couple minutes later as he was leaving the beach. And that’s when he decided to tell me off for being the most irresponsible, lazy and inattentive parent. In a very rare show of calmness I just gave a quick nod and turned away from him. But since he had made me feel like a failure I decided to check with Emma on how she was feeling when she came back up to the tent.
- Me: Hey Emma…. you know when that wave knocked you over? Were you scared.
- Emma: Well, it was so fun at first. I was laughing. And then that man scared me by grabbing me. But he let me go so I wasn’t scared anymore. AND mommy! I came up with an idea! If I jump OVER the waves they can’t make me fall so I’ll try that next time.
So thank you Mr. Over Concerned Beach Going Dad. I guess despite my horrible parenting skills I’m still raising a pretty fantastic kid.
Twelve years later anniversary dinners have gone from Michelin-star-make
-reservations-months-in-advance-in-NYC-and-sell-your-first-born-to-pay-for-it to a no reservations needed (yet still awesome) Ethiopian restaurant with a hangry kid in tow and ice cream afterwards and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Happy anniversary Ryan!!! 💕💕💕 Thank you for 12 crazy and amazing years.
Success! Emma made it through her first musical! Although she was super upset when I told her she had to pretend to be 5… didn’t know there was an age minimum when I bought the tickets. Ryan was also probably super excited…. to have Emma replace him in seeing future musicals with me. #oneofmyfavoritemusicals #sangalongwithallthesongs
They are apparently filming a movie in front of Emma’s daycare. The scene is supposed to take place in New York City.
Ummm…. I know I’ve been away from NY for almost 5 months, but last I’ve checked downtown Honolulu looks nothing like NYC.
Although the scaffolding put up around the (actual) Irish Pub and the yellow cabs they’ve brought in definitely make me homesick for the Big Apple…. I know I know… I was always an impostor living it up in cheaper CT.
Me: What did you do this weekend?
Co-worker: Well, my wife was out of town…
Me: Oh, so you were on baby-sitting duty then?
Co-worker: You know, it’s not actually called baby-sitting when it’s your own kid.
Me: Huh. Who knew.