A little less than 2 weeks ago my grandfather passed away. Despite the fact that he was 99 years old, it came as a shock to me…. I guess I figured he’d live forever. To be fair we weren’t that close, he married my grandmother when my mom (the youngest child) was already 18 years old and since they never really had to merge their families since the kids were grown and gone, most family get togethers over the years remained separate, with my grandpa spending time with his kids and their children and my grandmother visiting with us. But with my biological grandfather dying when my mom was only 9, this man was the only maternal grandfather I ever had.
His funeral is on Thursday and I’m not going… for the same reason that we aren’t close. Because my grandmother is awesome and fighting and getting better, but isn’t doing great. And a trip back to Hawaii is not easy. So while I pray it is not the case, if there is only 1 funeral I can make it back for this coming year… I would rather it be for her.
So with all the above thoughts floating through my brain, I don’t know why this pissed me off: my side of the family (the children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren of my grandma) were left off the obituary. My mother who has actually wiped my grandpa’s butt after he’s used the bathroom (ewww so gross so gross so gross) wasn’t mentioned. While the obituary didn’t mention any grandchildren by name, it listed a number… five. I can do the math. Those 5 do not include, me, my sister or my other cousins. Which okay, I get it, we aren’t direct descendants. But considering he’s the only grandfather I ever had on my mom’s side…. I’m pretty pissed.
Oh well…. A hui hou kakou, Grandpa.